Prose That Blows

Prose that ****s 5 – Taboo

Almost every inflation story contains certain buzzwords that we’re all familiar with.  Not that these are necessarily bad things, but it can get a little old reading these over and over.  With that in mind, it’s time to put the thinking caps on and rewrite the age-old book of inflation vocabulary.


  • For this contest, you are NOT allowed to use the following words in any part of your story:
    • Balloon
    • Big
    • Blimp
    • Bloat
    • Blow
    • Expand
    • Grow
    • Huge
    • Inflate
    • Large
    • Massive
    • Swell
  • You may NOT use any other tenses of these words (e.g. “blew”, “grew”, “enlarge”) or any words which have these as their root word (e.g. “ballooning”, “inflation”, “swollen”, “bigger”).
  • Your story must be at least 500 words (no cop-outs!) and cannot exceed 750 words.
  • All other general rules apply.

Can it be done???  Hell yes it can be done, and we want to see just how well it can be done.  Be creative.  Think outside the box.  Free your mind.


Awards up for grabs this time are:

  • Best Story – This story best satisfies the requirements of the contest, is the most technically sound (spelling, grammar, punctuation, overall structure), and is generally superior to the others.  The Best Story is considered the overall winner of the contest.
  • Funniest Story – This story brings the laughs.
  • Most Original Story – This story is innovative in its style, content, or inflation method, and did not conform to widely-used conventions in inflation fiction.
  • Least Contrived Use of a Thesaurus – This story did not try too hard to avoid the aforementioned words and was a fairly natural read.


E-mail your stories to doubleintegral ( or Pakona (  Please DO NOT post them publicly (e.g. on a forum,, your DeviantArt account) since that will no longer make your entry anonymous.


Submissions are due at 11:59pm Eastern Daylight Time on Friday, March 18, 2011.

Happy writing!


One Response

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  1. Johnny Mandingo said, on March 11, 2011 at 6:38 pm

    it turns out the story had too many words, i had to split it up into two parts. i hope it can be counted

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